This article examines the failed reform of the abbey of Grestain by Arnulf, bishop of Lisieux (r. 1141–81). Faced with a disobedient abbot, in whose absence the monks had resorted to violence and murder, Arnulf saw an opportunity to stamp his authority on his diocese by turning the monastery into a house of canons regular. Arnulf’s policies were shaped by the example of his older brother John, bishop of Sées (r. 1124–44), and his uncle and predecessor in his own bishopric John of Lisieux (r. 1107–41), as well as his mentor Geoffrey of Lèves, bishop of Chartres (r. 1116–49). A close reading of Arnulf’s letters demonstrates that Arnulf's conception of religious leadership and his representation of the crisis at Grestain were formed not only by familial networks, but also by the wider social and educational ideals of the eleventh and twelfth centuries filtered through the Victorines.