Drawing on interviews with 24 heterosexual young men in Sweden,this paper explores their experiences of sexual encounters, consent,and violations of sexual integrity. The interviewees idealized con-sent and sex based on reciprocity, attempting to take active respon-sibility for securing consent before engaging in sexual activities.This was often driven by a desire to be respectful, but at times,these safety measures appeared to be attempts to portray them-selves as progressive or to protect themselves from potential rapeaccusations. Analysing the participants’ experiences of consentprocesses and sexual violations through Berlant’s theory of frictionas an inevitable part of all social relations, we showcase how sexand intimacy are far from straightforward. Despite genuine effortsto obtain consent and maintain mutual respect in sexual encoun-ters, some of the young men had nevertheless violated their part-ners’ sexual integrity, while others had experienced having sexagainst their own will but often without seeing this as sexualviolations. Despite its promise of regulating the inconvenience ofsexual intimacy, we demonstrate how consensual sex may be awk-ward and fraught with difficulties in understanding one another,especially in moments of excitement and pleasure, as encounteringthe other challenges the fantasy of sovereign masculinity.